A lot has happened in the last two months. Like, a shit ton.
Which, when you think about it, can’t be any more than a normal ton. I mean, a ton of shit would still weigh a ton. As a unit of measurement, it fails, and that’s how we generally use it.
A ton of shit—now that’s something no one wants. And that’s been the last 60 days for me. A ton of shit … and some really good things.
Since I can’t talk about the shit, here’s the good stuff.
I’m fully out and presenting as female all the time now. It’s been scary and liberating and so fucking weird, but so fucking good, all at the same time. Today, I ran to Walmart and the grocery store and I was floored that I wasn’t more worried about people staring.
People stare. I’m tall. I have wide shoulders. They stare. But every day, I care less.
Being yourself matters way more than what people think about you when you’re being yourself. And having lived a long-ass time (another bizarre unit of measurement) in the closet, hidden and NOT myself, being me is so sweet that no amount of gawking can ruin it.
I’m starting to get tickled by the gawking, really. Stare, you fuckers. I don’t care.
That’s the best of the good news. There’s been other minor stuff. I discovered that thrift stores are the best, cheapest way to acquire a whole new wardrobe quickly. I ditched all my boy clothes. I’m getting decent with makeup. And I haven’t left my purse anywhere.
Yet. I’m assured that will happen.
OH! And … my legal name and birth marker have been updated with the great state of Texas. I’m a girl, y’all—paperwork and all. HA!
I have a lot more to say, but this quick update will have to do for now because I also feel like logging into a game and inflicting some pixel death on some hapless noobs. (I’m deadly with a mouse and keyboard.)
More to come. I haven’t forgotten this lovely little blog.