Journal

Set Up

Yesterday my AC was out.

A tech showed up at the house late in the afternoon. He was a nice enough guy, only too happy to get things back up and running in a jiffy. (Thank God. It was hot.)

At one point he mentioned something about the temperature outside. As he headed back out into the heat, the irony of his situation struck me. He forgoes the comfort of air conditioning, even as he labors to restore it for others.

All kinds of deep for basic home maintenance, right?

But that irony is something I know well. I’m very personally committed to acceptance and inclusion. I don’t care who you are. It doesn’t matter if we don’t agree. I want you to walk away from an encounter with me feeling you were treated like a human being.

With respect. With empathy. With basic validation just for being you.

And yet I often deny those same things to myself.

There are whole days when my internal dialogue is a shitstorm of negativity. I say things to myself I would never say to anyone else. And even when the logical part of me knows I’m just having a down kinda day, there’s power in those mental messages.

You become what you tell yourself you already are.

Don’t do that.

Don’t roll your eyes. Yes, I know it sounds like psuedo-spiritual bullshit. That doesn’t mean it’s not true.

There are few forces in the world as powerful as the still, small voice in the back of your own head. Your voice. If you spend every day telling yourself how much people hate you, or how ugly you are, or how weird, rejected, unlucky, unloved … whatever … those are the things you’re sure to experience.

You’re setting yourself up for it. You’re making it true with every horrible internal proclamation.

I know. I’ve done it.

So part of my new thing is to pay a lot of attention to that voice. When it starts spewing negative crap, I plan to tell it to shut the fuck up. And then, because silence isn’t really an option, I’ll intentionally tell myself something good about me. 🙂

Cheesy? Sure. But I’m willing to bet I’ll be a happier person for it.

Wanna give it a go?